Kathy

While the Heartbeat Bloggers were working on their series of motherly love posts, photographer, Kathy, had her own epiphany. At the end of the summer, as her youngest son, Ryan, was heading back to college, it hit her that her nest was – well – about to empty. To celebrate the bittersweet moment they went on a “Mom and Ryan day” to the New England Aquarium in Boston’s North End. Kathy oldest son, Dustin, now teaches in Thailand. The boys were ages 4 and 8 when Kathy’s husband died and she was left to raise them on her own.

Q. What were you thinking when this photograph was taken? When you look at this do you see your son as a man or as child?

A. “I’ll be honest with you. I don’t see the man. I see the man in the making. And I was thinking that this was a turning point in my life as a mother. That he was not going to be home next summer – that he would not be living with me anymore – that my home would no longer be his home.  I was so focused for so long on raising my children that I didn’t think it would end, or I didn’t notice it was ending.”

Boston, MA

June and Lucy

On this amazing, sunny morning, Lucy gets ready for her first day of eighth grade, while mom, June, a writer, helps schlep books, bags and instruments. June and Bill, her husband of 24 years, adopted Lucy from China, 12 years ago. The annual first-day-of-school photograph is a family ritual.

Q. What do you love most about your mom?
A. (June) I love that Lucy has such a big and kind heart. And she’s a wonderful sous chef.

Q. What do you love most about your daughter?
A. (Lucy) She helps me with basically everything I need, especially with my English homework. Not my best subject. And I love cooking with her.

Nashua, N.H.

Shelley

Shelley, a stylist and hair salon owner, had her first child, Taylor, when she was 18 and son, Zach, three years later. Ten months ago, at age 42, Shelley gave birth to her third child – Boyd.

Q. How is motherly love different now than it was when you had your first baby at age, 18?

A. It’s still unconditional love, but when I was younger, before I had children, I didn’t really understand what that meant. This time I knew. There are plenty of times when it doesn’t feel good but you do it anyway, because that’s what being a mother is. You sacrifice for your children. It’s absolute devotion.  I also understand the payoff to that devotion …when things are good, I make a point of taking it all in so I can remember those wonderful moments.

- Hudson, N.H.

Amanda

Outside the family business, Cafe La Florence, in Treasure Cay, Bahamas, Amanda, 28, snuggles her one-year-old daughter, Paisley. Amanda is in a  relationship with Paisley's father and firmly believes that "love is beautiful." 

Q.  What do you want to teach your daughter about love?

A.  To have fullness of love, you first have to love yourself. Anyone who comes to you and anyone who wants to have a relationship with you, has to love you for who you are. And love is unconditional.  Some people make mistakes. Some people are not perfect. If you love them, you'll deal with it. If they love you, they'll do better.

- Treasure Cay, Abaco, Bahamas

Caitlin

 

Caitlin, 28, and her husband, Rick, have two daughters, Cathlene, 4, and Jane, five months. Caitlin went to midwifery school and in the past, served as doula for five births. When it came time to have her own babies, there was no doubt that they’d be born at home. And there was also no doubt, that she and Rick did not want to learn the sex of their children ahead of time.

Q.  Did you fall in love at first sight when your babies were born?

A.  I did. I absolutely did fall in love at first sight. Cathlene was born by candlelight at 2 in the morning in our bed. Since both of my daughters were born at home there was no interference - no bright lights, or machines to get in the way of me, my husband and them at the moment of their birth.  I think not knowing what (what sex) the babies were, was part of being so in love at first sight … there were no expectations, no feeling like you have already met the person. It allowed us to meet them for the first time.

Nashua, N.H.

We Heart Art

Market Basket is a low-priced grocery chain of 71 stores with 25,000 employees. Since July 18, there have been rallies, boycotts, and protests (like the one shown in the above, right photos at the Hudson, N.H. Market Basket) over the removal of former CEO, Arthur T. Demoulas. Arthur T., as he's lovingly called by his employees, was replaced by a board of directors now controlled by his cousin, Arthur S. Demoulas, a rival successor to the supermarket empire built by the Arthurs' immigrant grandparents. In the last three and a half weeks many members of the stores' management teams, sympathetic to Arthur T., were fired or resigned. And last week hours were cut for thousands of part-time workers because of the severe decline in business due to the job actions resulting from this family feud. The company also told about 200 employees they will be fired unless they report to work by Friday of this week. The 71 stores, like the Fletcher Street Market Basket, stay open but shelves are nearly empty due to interrupted shipping on the part of warehouse workers sympathetic to Arthur T.

Bill, 28, is the front end manager at the Fletcher Street Market Basket in Lowell, Massachusetts. Market Basket Store # 1. This is the site (above, left photo) of the first grocery store opened by the Demoulas  family after they emigrated from Greece nearly 100 years ago when the city was still a booming center of manufacturing. This is still very much an ethnic neighborhood, where most customers walk to the store instead of drive and shop for several items once or twice a day. Bill has worked for the Market Basket Company for 12 years and knows many of his customers by name. One woman with a toddler in tow, looked at Bill and smiled. “Sorry I’m breaking the boycott. But someone needs ice cream.” 

Q.  Do people really love Arthur T. (ousted CEO of the Market Basket grocery store chain) that much?

A.  Yes.  Absolutely yes. Arthur T. has always taken care of his employees. He's always doing these wonderful things for people and not because he's getting publicity for it. He just does them quietly because he's a good guy. And he's been doing it for years. That's why there's been this reaction. Our receiving director died just recently.  Mr. D drove to Haverhill to spend time with his widow. He's picked up the tabs for some employees' funerals to help their families. You'd think a CEO would just be there for the higher ups. But Mr. D is there for everyone - the managers, the baggers, the part-time people. Look at me. I'm 28, single. I've been working for Market Basket for 12 years and I just was able to buy a house. Not too many people my age, in my position could do that. It's because Mr. D takes care of his employees and we're able to make a living, a good living. So it's no surprise that everyone - the employees and our customers - reacted to this the way they did. We're a family. We're all a family. And the head of that family is Arthur T.

Lowell, MA

JoAnn, 62 and Greg, 63




JoAnn and Greg met online more than two years ago. She was a widow who had been married 34 years when her husband died in 2005. Greg is divorced. Both have grown children. While they see each other nearly every day, like this sunny Sunday at Benson's Park in Hudson, N.H. when they enjoyed a picnic, the two live in different houses in different states and like it that way.

Q. How is love different now than when you were young?


A. When you're young, you think you're in love, but you're really in lust and then it turns into love. In your 60s it's the same thing really. Just the other day Greg asked me if I thought I'd ever feel like this again. You know - like a teenager. Our kids are kind of disgusted by that - you know - the sexual stuff. So in that way, love is the same. But what's different is that we have a whole life behind us. We look at things differently. If I haven't seen him in a while, I can't wait to see him again, but I'm okay if I don't. I like my independence. I like my me time. I got used to that after my husband died. That's different than when you're young and you feel like you're going to die if you don't see each other every minute. I know in my heart I love Greg, but I also know I could live without him if I had to. But I don't want to.  He's it for me. I know that.

Hudson, N.H.

Sam and Hope - 16

There are those who think there's no way a teenager could know what love really is.  But many a wise person, including William Shakespeare, would disagree.  Juliet was more tween than teen when she fell for her Romeo.  And while not quite Verona, Hayward's Ice Cream in Nashua, New Hampshire, has been the summer setting for the young and the smitten for more than 70 years.

Q. Do you think you know what love is? And if so, what is it?

A. "Absolutely," said Sam.  "It's got nothing to do with age. It's any feeling which brings two humans together.  Love is a connection.  I know more about her than I do about myself.  Love is literally everything." Hope also is sure that she knows what love is.  "Love is Sam," she said without missing a beat. "When I first loved him as a friend, I thought he was perfect. Then when I started dating him I found out he wasn't perfect and I loved him more."

Nashua, N.H.

Ben and Michaela

There are those who think there's no way a teenager could know what love really is.  But many a wise person, including William Shakespeare, would disagree.  Juliet was more tween than teen when she fell for her Romeo.  And while not quite Verona, Hayward's Ice Cream in Nashua has been the summer setting for the young and the smitten for more than 70 years.  Ben, 18 and Michaela, 17 just starting dating.

Q. Do you think you know what love is? And if so, what is it?

A. "I don't know if I know," said Michaela. "But if I had to guess, I'd say it's when you care more about another person than you do about yourself." Ben said,  "I think I know. What love is for me is the feeling of emotion and attraction to a person - to the entire person with every fiber of your soul."

Q. What do you like most about each other?
A. "He makes me laugh," said Michaela. "She's cute as a button," said Ben.

Nashua, N.H.

Jean and David

Jean lost her husband to cancer in 2006.  When a friend suggested she would some day love again, she said, "I'm not interested. I already had the best.” Jean is now engaged to David, a divorcee. They are pictured above in their home in Nashua, NH.

Q.  How did it feel when you realized you fell in love again?

A.  I thought, “This is shocking, because I never thought it would happen again.”  I remember a friend of mine saying, “Do you know you are in love with David?" And I said, “I am?”  So I thought about it for a moment and I said, “Yeah, I guess I am. What a gift.” 

Nashua, N.H.

S-HAIRING THE LOVE

Q. What does hair have to do with love?

Let us count the ways. Students from Continental Academie of Hair Design in Hudson, New Hampshire like Ashley (left) and Rebecca, showed their love of community by volunteering a whole Saturday afternoon doing hair for the school's first-ever Unified Buddy Ball Candy Land Extravaganza.

A. "When your hair looks good nothing can stop you. It helps you love yourself and nothing is more powerful than that," said Rebecca. "If your hair looks the way you want," said Ashley, "it boosts your inner love and that love shows on the outside.

Hudson N.H.

*Stay tuned for the next post of Heart Beat Bloggers for photos from the Unified Ball.

Liz and Nicole

Liz and Nicole are getting married in November in front of 200 of their closest friends and family; but first there's the sweet ritual of the cake tasting. Certainly there will be more complicated decisions to be made during the course of their lives together, but few will be so rich in anticipation and butter cream. It was at Jacques Fine European Pastries in Suncook, New Hampshire that we asked the couple about the multi-layered confection that is matrimony.

Q. Why get married? Why not just live together?

A. "I don't want a roommate. I want a life partner," said Liz (left). For Nicole it's a no brainer. "You can cohabitate or you can solidify your partnership - literally sharing everything with each other for the rest of our lives."

Pembroke, N.H.

Tarah

Q. How does it feel to see yourself in full wedding regalia for the first time?

Tarah got married today. A month ago we were watching her try on her gown for the last time before the big day. Such joy. Such a smile. It was almost too bright to look at without sunglasses. 

Today only Tarah’s brand-new husband, Ryan, was the one to warm in that smile’s glow. The pair chose to share their nuptials on a beach in Jamaica with just one another, the sand, the sea and the sky as witnesses.

Four weeks ago it was her friends gathered on a cushy couch and her mom in Florida, via FaceTime watching the 25-year-old hair stylist twirl in front of a wall of mirrors at a bridal shop in Bedford, New Hampshire. That's when she answered the question without hesitation.

A. “Amazing. I was worried about the butt, before it was altered, but it’s not too tight and the boobs look good.” Everyone present in the flesh and on line laughed, but wholeheartedly agreed. Tarah would be a stunning bride on the beach. Tarah would be a stunning bride on a football field. Tarah would be a stunning bride just about anywhere. Her beauty secret was no secret. Pure, unadulterated love.

Bedford, N.H.

Debbie and Dean

“Jerry Springer has nothing on us,” said Dean, who first met, Debbie, when she was 15. She was his best friend’s girlfriend. A few years later Debbie introduced Dean to her older sister.

“We all got married in a double wedding when we were in our 20s,” said Debbie who along with Dean on this chilly day, were selling prom dresses and bridesmaid gowns at the Londonderry Flea Market. So to get this straight. Dean married Debbie's sister and Debbie married Dean's best friend.

And in an act that could be considered a portent of the future, the preacher got the couples mixed up. 

“Her first child is my godson,” said Dean.

“And my ex is the godfather to Dean’s oldest son.”

After a while both couples divorced. Both Debbie and Dean started dating other people.

“I swore I’d never marry again,” said Dean. 

Truth be told, said Dean, “My ex (Debbie’s sister) pushed us together. So  years later Dean asked Debbie out.  The first date – sharing cheese fries at a restaurant in a lighthouse in Maine. The couple still has an ashtray from that date as a memento.

“From then on I schmoozed her,” said Dean, who has worked as a sheet metalist or “tin knocker” most of his life.

“We were just looking at our love letters last night,” said Debbie.

And that resolve never to marry again? Out the window.

Debbie and Dean wed in June, 2001.

Dean laughs. “I didn’t want to get to know a whole new family. This was perfect.”


Londonderry N.H.

Rebecca and Steve

The parents of flower children, Elizabeth and Adrianna, have a romance steeped in determination. “He stalked me at my job at Teavana in the mall. He’d come in every day for a cup of tea, then he ended up asking for my number.” That was four years and one set of identical twins ago.  And does Steve still indulge in a daily cuppa? “I don’t work at Teavana anymore,” said Rebecca. “We can’t afford it without the store discount.”

- Pumpkin Festival, Hudson, N.H.

Kim and Mark

What’s the secret to a long, a happy romance? Live in different states and stay single. At least that’s how it looks for Mark and Kim, both 51, who have dated for 19 years, have never been married before and have no children. The couple talked about their relationship before a Bingo game started at a Kiwanis Club one recent, winter afternoon.  One day in 1995, Kim visited a phone company for her job as a corporate travel agent. Mark, an electrician, was doing repairs in the room in which Kim was working.  “I asked her to go to the office Christmas party,” said Mark.  “I said ‘no’ at first because I wasn’t an employee of the company,” said Kim. But Mark said he could get her a ticket.  “It was a good party,” Kim recalls. “It was love at first date,” said Mark, who guessed it was a black frock Kim wore that night. “It was a green, strapless dress,” she said. So will the couple ever marry? They’re pretty sure – yeah – someday. But in the meanwhile, said Kim; “The way things are - keeps things fresh.”

Mary Ellen and Tom

Where else would young college students find romance and love in 1963? For Mary Ellen and Tom – uh that would be a fallout shelter.  Mary Ellen needed one more elective credit to finish out her sophomore year studying special education at the University of Kentucky.  After ruling out judo and woodwind instruments, she took a course in fallout shelter management. Serious stuff during the Cold War. The class culminated with a mock nuclear event over the course of a weekend. “It was very realistic, with a recording of the president’s voice announcing there had been an attack on our country,“ said Mary Ellen. “It was gruesome, but it was also fascinating. They were talking about what was going on outside and that there were still people alive." Not exactly the typical stuff of romance. Mary Ellen’s job was to dole out the limited supply of food and water.  This is where Tom comes into the picture. He was a freshman at the school but he also served on the Blue Grass Council of the Boy Scouts in Kentucky. They needed volunteers for the mock attack and he signed up. “She had a hard time siphoning that water,” said Tom. “So I helped her.” Mary Ellen said from that point on “he followed me everywhere in that shelter. It was creepy. When it came time to go to sleep he moved his cot near mine. And I got up and moved my cot to get away from him.” After the class was over, Tom found out where Mary Ellen was living and called her every night. “I wouldn’t go out with him for three weeks,” said Mary Ellen. Then she caved. And a year later they married, went on to have two careers, two children, six grandchildren and one great-grand child, Willow, who was featured in the previous post.

Sky and Kat

For five years Sky took to the road solo – hitchhiking across America in true Jack Kerouac style.  A year and half ago, he found himself at a rainbow gathering in Ithaca, N.Y. where “no money or modern conveniences were allowed.” It was there, while foraging for food and cooking on an open fire, he met Kat, an artist, who had also spent a few years thumbing around America. Six months later – on Valentine’s Day, the traveling chums became – well – more.  "We found out we were pregnant in Oregon then hightailed it here - home where Kat's family lives."  Sky, 22, is now working as a barista and Kat, 20, is spending time at home with their daughter, Willow, who was born this January. – Nashua, N.H.